at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize
