some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
