yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Randomize
