Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Omg I joined a choir last night...
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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