If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
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