Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
