i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Randomize
