new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
So much rum. So many feels.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
My vagina is very pro this idea
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
