i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
