You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize
