Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
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