was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
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