So drunk, too bad you don't want this
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I'm experimenting with sincerity
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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