So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
