I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
