Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
