There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Randomize
