you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize
