i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
You are the jesus of drinking
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