you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
