lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
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