I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
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