yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Randomize
