It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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