Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
