If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Randomize
