There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
