I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
