So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
