Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize