i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
