please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Randomize
