I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Randomize