I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
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