Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
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