love makes seman taste better
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Randomize
