my soul wont recognize me after tonight
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
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