He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
whose parrot is this?
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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