I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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