I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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