i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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