hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
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