**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
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