that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
You're earring is so big in my mouth
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
