Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Randomize
