ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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