Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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