I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
