You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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