white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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