My hand turned me down
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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