Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
